Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
