your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
