he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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