Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize