im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
