Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
