She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Randomize
