I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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