Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You took a bar mat shot.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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