so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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