THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Randomize
