just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
