Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize