It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
This is classic penis vs brain.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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