This girl is more easily done than said...
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
