Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
His nipple licking is glorious
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