had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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