Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
