I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
