Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Randomize
