Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Who put my cat in the fridge?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
