Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
