Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
