Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
But theres a keg here and me gusta
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
