have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
