I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
