yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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