I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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