He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
now i know why i became what i already was.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
