Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
its not stalking. its research.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
