Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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