Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize