it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
