Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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