i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
