she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I'm sobbing to NWA
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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