Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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