Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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