Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Randomize
