Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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