It's just like the Real World with babies
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
