We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Randomize
