I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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