Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize