I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
