worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
