Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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