would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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