how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
