Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
